The past few months have been one of the best summers I’ve had in a long time. I spent time breathing fresh air and stargazing in the Berkshires. I turned up in Washington D.C. with friends for a weekend that was full of surprises. I celebrated love at a beautiful Jamaican-Nigerian wedding in Connecticut. I spent time with family I haven’t seen in a while and made new connections that I’m hoping will last. But every season must come to an end and we’ll be saying goodbye to summer soon. Before we do though let’s sit down for minute to talk about some lessons.
1. If you ignore your feelings they will catch up to you eventually.
I feel like I keep learning this lesson the hard way over and over again. Too often when I feel myself getting emotional about something my reflex has been to bury it down deep and keep it moving. It works for a while until whatever I’m feeling slowly starts to seep into everything I do. Suddenly so many things about the world seem like a personal attack. Something someone says can trigger an insecurity that I thought I had a handle on or a totally mundane situation can end with me lashing out at someone who doesn’t deserve it. I’ve found that when I’m doing my best to get enough sleep, make sure I’m eating, and taking time to intentionally process my feelings it turns out better for me and those around me.
2. Its okay to be scared of letting go.
This one’s also hard for me. I’ve had to learn that you can be strong and scared at the same time. It doesn’t have to be one or the other. Over the past few weeks I’ve been sorting through things and relationships in my life trying to decide what needs to stay and what needs to go… and its scary sometimes. If the thing or person is important to me I start thinking about the history we and how much they’ve meant to me. I start to convince myself that I can’t live without it and then I have to make the conscious decision to remind myself that I absolutely can.
“Whatever is bringing you down, get rid of it. Because you’ll find that when you’re free . . . your true self comes out.” – Tina Turner
It may seem like you can’t let go of what you have in front of you, but if you’re anything like me then you probably felt like that before you let the last thing go. But you did and even though it may have have hurt like hell it didn’t break you. You’re still here. If you did it before then God-willing you can do it again. There may be better waiting for you.
3. You. Are. Worthy.
I am constantly fighting the urge to prove myself to people. To be honest, most of the time the pressure I feel to be perfect doesn’t come from anyone other that myself. It’s time to break that habit.
You don’t have to prove anyone that you are worthy or deserving of love. The first step to thriving is walking in your truth. You have the right to take up as much space as your heart desires, laugh as loud as you please, and dream as big as you can imagine. There is nothing about you that is “too much”. Your hair, your passion, your quirks and everything in between make you who you are. I’m not saying that we don’t all have things that we can work on. What I am saying is that our worthiness doesn’t come from what job we have, the size of our house or the relationships you have.
We are human. Humans are imperfect. We are imperfect… And we should celebrate that.
Love and light,
Felecia Shanice ❤